Thursday, December 10, 2015

A year ago today I sat in the hospital having a blood transfusion. I went in for pre-op testing for a minor procedure to stop some excessive bleeding. Turns out I had lost so much blood in a weeks time they wheeled me straight into the ER. The doctors told me that my organs could have shut down - which seemed to scare me after the fact. We knew there was a problem and we were going to take care of it .... God works in mysterious ways and I'm forever grateful that everything worked out the way they did. . Yesterday I received the most amazing promo video for the http://ift.tt/1lSZump photo gallery slated to be on exhibit in January. Here is a still from the promo. The photo shoot was empowering. The amazing photographer Camile @ciao_bella_photos was so easy to work with and she helped me feel beautiful in my own skin. Her objective was to do exactly what it's called - find the heart within the warrior of us survivors. Although I looked to her for direction she asked me what I wanted to see. . We all had a different approach to the project and I'm looking forward to seeing them all. The shoot was six months after the transfusion. I seriously believed I would walk out of my final surgery and move right back into real life. It's been much more challenging than I expected. The health issues that landed me in the hospital are thankfully behind me. . Today I look back ONLY to see how far I've come. Today I rocked out an hour of cardio and weights where last year I couldn't stand without shaking or walk up five steps without feeling like I would pass out. This year hasn't been smooth sailing either but you know me. I never back down from a challenge. 😊. . This promo video (you can find it on my FB or inbox me to see it) solidified my strength and my determination to propel myself forward and the strongest survivor I can be. Just as those who did so before me - the ones that lead the way - who taught me survival is not only possible but can be had on my own terms. F*ckinG AWESOME!! . Thank you Camile and your amazing crew for making this happen and bringing out the warrior in us all. πŸŽ€


Monday, November 30, 2015

November ends with a final class in my yoga studio's Gratitude Challenge. We focused on being present in the moment and letting go of what does serve us; having gratitude for where we are and what we have. The challenge was dedicated to quality, not quantity. . I managed to attend 15 classes in 30 days. It was less classes than I had wanted to take but I knew I had to factor in the holidays and prior commitments. . The best part is that I grew. I feel better than I have in nearly 2.5 years. I've struggled this season with body image, letting go of my cancer identity (I had cancer; I am not cancer) and founds some roots to plant for the future. . Affirmations are I AM statements that I tell myself and clients everyday. But something was lost in translation. In my five years of practice I've never been able to look myself in the eye during yoga. . Seriously. . I never had to look at myself when I taught my classes at the gym. I had to look at everyone else. It was an easy way to blow myself off and not start picking apart the things I didn't like. . Last week a friend of mine said that when she looks in the mirror during yoga she tells herself. She can do it. She is strong. She believes in herself. . Did I mention that something for lost in translation? I never do it in the mirror. During savasana, yes but never active. After my 30 days I know that I want to be true to my word. If I say I I will do it. If I say it I will be it. . Therefore I AM: strong, powerful, empowered, positive, responsible, badass, kind, courageous, happy and loved. I am loving. I am a force to be reckoned with .... I am ME. Believe and receive ✨✨✨✨✨ #BreastCancerSurvivor #FearlessVixenFitness #grateful #blessed